Big Bad Santa: He Knows When You’ve Been Bearding, He Knows When You Lift Weights…
The newest member of the Beardilizer team is something of a celebrity. You may have heard of him. He has a very exclusive lodge on prime North Pole property, drives a posh sleigh pulled by reindeer, and hefts 650 lb sacks of toys with ease.
Okay, not exactly. But close!
Our newest member is Albie Mushaney, a 43 year old, gloriously bearded power lifter. He spends his time not delivering presents working at a correctional facility (he knows when you’ve been naughty…), and aside from bringing Christmas cheer to all of the children of the world, he has five of his own.
Did we mention the beard?
That’s how the whole Santa gig got started. Albie’s been powerlifting on and off since high school, eventually deciding to quit a couple decades ago, due to weight gain and some less than stellar performance. But what he actually needed to get back in the game was a confidence boosting beard.
But he was in for a surprise when his beard grew in—a pristine, Arctic white! Suddenly. Albie had a new goal. He wasn’t just going to become one of the strongest men in the world. He was going to become the strongest Santa.
Forget those mall Santas with their synthetic beards hung off of their ears by rubber bands, and their pillow-stuffed stomachs. Albie is the real deal—real muscles, real mass, and real magnificent mane.
Albie embraces his natural santa-ness, calling his goal Operation Big Bad Santa. In addition to fighting gravity for the biggest muscles and growing an incredible beard of power, he’s also facing off against Type II diabetes—talk about a man with the world on his shoulders!
We’re delighted to have Albie on the team, and we’re even more delighted that he’s chosen to trust Beardilizer with making that beard of mythic proportions presentable for competitions. We may have to work up a milk and cookies fragrance for our famous Beardilizer Beard Oil now…
So, please give Mr. Claus a warm welcome to Beardilizer!
Oh, and you still have a few days left until Christmas. If you haven’t added some beard boosting products to your Christmas list yet, you might want to let your own personal Santa know you’d love to find our Beardilizer Imperial Beard Gift Pack under your tree. It contains 4 oz each of our natural beard wax and our conditioner and softener cream, 5.1 oz of our beard wash, 4 oz of your favorite scent of beard oil, and a bad-ass black reindeer—er, buffalo—horn comb.
Or, if you’re looking for a stocking stuffer, check out our Beard Cleaning Wipes. They’re a beard cleansing solution so perfectly portable, you can throw a couple of packs in your gym bag for those sweaty workouts, just like our own Big Bad Santa does.
Of course, if you’ve been naughty, Albie’s just going to leave you a stocking full of very, very heavy coal.
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